Pip

(A conversation that happened a few months ago)

‘It’s a secret court, but at least it’s a court,’ came the reply from a colleague of my dad.

 I looked up from my laptop, my lover…‘FISC? The FISA court,’ I asked him, ‘Is that what you mean?’ Let’s call him Buzz [hair reference, military style].

He didn’t look overly surprised, but queried, ‘How then are your skills on the subject of FISA?’ [Foreign Intelligence Surveillance Act].

I shrugged, ‘Listen, I claim no real fundamental zeal for legal talk because, as we all know, half the time what any of those people say can sound as if they are following the Constitution when in actual fact they have just verbally thrown you the proverbial BIRD…’

He laughed, ‘I’m still curious to hear what is out there in the public sector now that the Terrorist Surveillance Program is being replaced by a new effort involving the FISA court.’

‘Well,’ I began, ‘I was reading the congressional transcripts from the Senate Judiciary Committee oversight hearing where the Attorney General testified not so long ago.’

Eyes of Buzz raised accusing, ‘you little BLOG kitten.’

‘Who says I got it from a Blog?’

‘Never you mind, inconsequential. I want to know pip what the chat is “out there” about it.’

‘Well, Buzz, what I have to say may or may not please your bosses,’ was my beginning.

‘Again inconsequential.’

I dove right in.

‘Who is coaching these guys over at the Department of Justice, because let’s not mince words here Buzz, they have a talent for pissing a whole lot of people off.   In the transcripts for the whole world to see, the issue is made clear cut for many of us in Blogville when Senator Feingold stated, “Mr. Attorney General, it is a welcome change to learn that the president, with regard to the NSA program, has decided to return to the law. For more than five years, this administration conducted an illegal wiretapping program, including more than a year during which you and others publicly asserted that this violation of the law was absolutely essential to protecting the public from terrorists. And as Senator Kennedy already mentioned, you actually questioned the patriotism of those who criticized you.” Now Buzz think about this. If we believed that those listening in on us were a Benevolent force then there are huge numbers of people that would say, “Sieve through our information if it helps you track those who want to destroy our world.” But when this force feels that it is in the right to question the patriotism of any American who was critical of the warrant-less surveillance program, then the integrity of the Executive Branch must be questioned and that is what has been happening. To defend our Constitutional rights, as Americans against the Executive Branch, then puts us as citizens on Severe Red Alert. The irony of it all…’ I took a breath.

Buzz shrugged and insisted, ‘Don’t think that everyone that I work with was relaxed about wire tapping, there were those involved that were relieved when the New York Times story broke all those months ago. But for many and varied reasons pip.’

‘As if I don’t get it. I get it Buzz. But that is my point. Loads of people get it. That’s where those who advise those guys missed the boat. Loads of people support electronic surveillance of the enemy during a time of war. Contrary to the Attorney General’s statement and I quote, “… I mean, if you look on the blogs today, there are all kinds of people who have strong views about the ability of the government to surveil anyone for any reason. And so…” Contrary to that blanket statement made by the Attorney General, I swear Buzz, most people I’ve heard from don’t believe that waving the White Flag of peace and singing Kumbaya is the way to stop Al Qaeda. It is assumed that if you aren’t a proponent of everything this government does then it is implied that you are a peace loving patchouli smelling hippy from the 60’s …..what horseshit.’

Buzz stood up, ‘First of all, if any of you out there think this president would say and actually mean that he decided to return to the law as indicated by the good Senator, you’re in la la land along with him. If that were true, it would mean he admitted that the law was knowingly broken by him. True or not he doesn’t have the right physical equipment. Second, as far as “ the violation of the law being absolutely essential to protect the public from terrorists” ---- and I’m sure that is believed by some—then my creation of a secret vigilante cell to kill criminals who I think got off easy is okay. This is the double o seven theory: my license to kill. Third, there are NOT huge numbers of you who would say, “Sieve through our information Big Brother” no matter what the cause. Get Real! Fourth,’

‘Enough Already!’ doubling up and holding my side ‘Bang Bang, You Shot Me Down Nancy Sinatra.’

‘But I’m not half through pip.’

‘For today Buzz.’

He grabbed his trench coat and ear piece [his uniform of the day].

‘But before you leave, who do you think is the real enemy because the masses are having to ask the same question.’

‘Good question pip, but the masses will have to wait or preferably figure it out for themselves. I’m AWOL now and must get back.’

Mom, while going about her business but obviously amused by our conversation, threw in, ‘You know pip, I used to ask your father the same question and he would say, “Kelly, POGO, Earth Day 1970.”’

‘Okay, Mom, isn’t it bad enough that dad used riddles with you too…. Do you have to relay them to me? What is a POGO?’

‘Well, pip, A famous cartoonist by the name of Kelly created an even more famous comic strip called POGO and POGO’s most famous quote was used as a reprint on a poster acknowledging Earth Day, 1970.’

‘And???’

‘And…..POGO’s quote was ‘We have met the enemy and he is us.’

‘Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhh ……..Brother.’